the thing about mommyhood
is that it's so incredibly constant.
if you don't know what i mean by that you've never spent
a full 13 hour day with children
followed by another 13+ hour day with children
followed by an entire summer of children. that are yours.
that you are raising to be
law-abiding citizens
and lovers of Jesus more importantly.
oh mercy there are those moments when i just want to find the hidden camera
in my house or in my shopping cart or somewhere on my van's dashboard
and replay the moments that just occurred.
not always for comic relief (but sometimes)
but mostly just to verify to the world.....
yes, yes i just had to say that same thing 17 times in the last 10 minutes
{ and now someone's asking again }
yes, yes i did just have to tell my son not to lick the inside of the freezer
at ALDI as his brother cheered
on his near-victory tongue attachment to tilapia fillets
yes, yes i did just run across the living room, leaping into the bathroom
as my daughter almost fell head first into the tub
where her brothers were bathing
i wipe up spills approx 3 times a day
i wipe tears more often than that.
i have splenty of snot-smeared shirts
and the laundry to prove it all.
while i think my children are sometimes entertaining
i guarantee you that the target cashiers
never think so
{especially when one of my boys was about to pull the fire alarm
as i swiped my target card...
the one moment
i was distracted during check-out. promise.}
no amount of slushie bribery can or will stop my boys from being boys.
arm wrestling and basketball-style tossing of goods into the shopping cart.
random yells and bathroom words and running headfirst into displays.
{and they know better. mercy, do they know better}
don't even get me started on potty training being added to the mix
of summer 2012.
charity is now beyond the 'mike and ike' bag of goodies
everytime she goes
and onto the
'i think going potty is fun
when i know mommy is super duper busy and distracted' stage.
{ yeah. we're there. mercy.}
{ i don't want to forget these days.}
i don't want to forget the adorable legs hanging in the front of my shopping cart
and the random hugging by short arms around my neck.
i don't want to forget the crazy frustration that lasts for the moment.....or moments
but makes a great story for justin when the kids have been tucked into bed.
i don't want to forget the monday morning bible study
with 10 kids between my friends and i.
chaos mixed with God's grace and vulnerability and wisdom.
i don't want to forget my need to cry out for patience as a fruit of the Spirit
i know i can taste.
or the verses about strength and waiting that i cling to during this season.
don't let me forget.
there's nothing less grace-filled than forgetfulness mixed with judgment.
and i'm not about to be that woman.
so i come unglued sometimes in front of my children
and i ask for forgiveness if i've wronged them in some way.
those times, by God's work in my life, are becoming fewer and farther between
{praise Him}
but i know i want my kids to see a mom who is real about Jesus
more than a mom they perceive to be perfect
only to find out at some point they have been seriously fooled.
so i tell them i pray for them
and i pray with them.
i make grandious plans to read through ephesians 6 in the summer
and to make detailed armor of God to bring home the point.
but real life is a beautiful chaotic mess at the breakfast table
with each child wanting a different cereal poured
and so ephesians 6 is slowly but surely becoming a part
of breakfast chatter
with my boys excitedly telling me the part of the armor they remember that morning.
kinda, sorta, maybe with the idea of letting others go first being lost....
but we're getting there.
and i slowly but surely plant the Word of My Savior and theirs
into their sweet little hearts.
and mine overflows with the fruit i see.
my helpful little guys filling up my boxes at the end of grocery shopping
and sharing with each other
and shining with the love of Jesus as they obey
'with a happy heart'
that which i've asked of them.
and other moms in the checkout lanes next to mine
overhear my children picking out a bouquet of flowers for me
{all their own idea}
and there is oohing and ahhing
and i realize that i'm no super mom
and my kids are no perfect little people
but there are just some moments that fill me up with
the realization that i'm just so overwhelmingly blessed.
{wild moments and all.}
thank You, Jesus.